01 March 2009
Yeah, so it's been a while since I last went on a rant about still - STILL - not having a job. So I figure one's in order, since I don't really have anyone else to talk to about it, and since I don't really enjoy dumping on other people anyway. It's been, as of today, one full year since I started my full-on job search. One year ago today, I was a senior in college, just about to complete my bachelor's degree, and a resident assistant for Mountain View Hall at NAU. Since May 13, 2008, I have been jobless, save for two months of temp work during the elections. In this time, I have sent out hundreds of resumes and applications and only received a scant few letters in return telling me I'm not qualified or some such thing. My biggest fear is that I'll never find a job for which I'm suited and I will end up being one of those 30-year-olds working in a crappy retail job still living with their parents or something. It scares the Hell out of me. I've been on the verge of complete clinical depression for a while year now, and having experienced what it is like during last summer I don't ever want to feel that way again, but I don't know how not to when I'm doing everything I know how to do to find employment and nothing is happening in my favor. But what frustrates me the most is not know what it is I'm looking for. Most of my other friends, even if they don't have their dream jobs yet, at least have that goal as a beacon for measuring their success. Some want law school, others a career in nursing, and still others are looking to work for Congress. But me, I consider myself capable if not good at several different things, none of which I want to make "careers." I've always loved politics, but going through an election cycle every two years is exhausting, emotionally draining, and completely underappreciated. Not to mention that I don't think I've yet found a candidate whose ideals match my own. I am also pretty darn good at customer service and clerical-type things, like being a receptionist or sales associate. However, the thought of myself being stuck selling crap people don't need to people who look down on anyone with a name badge sickens me to my core. It's a fine "job" for people in high school and college looking for supplemental income or as a second job kind of thing, but in no way should retail or "customer service" ever be considered a profession. I actually can think of one "profession" which I think I would enjoy, which would combine one of my favorite activities with my job, and that would be working in baseball. But with that being a nine-month job which I don't know how to "apply" for, I'm kind of at a loss for how to proceed in the field. My mom thinks I should go to law school and become a lawyer, but I neither desire to work in professional law nor have the money to spend on a law degree. I can't even really pay for a Master's degree at a local university, but I am going to try to fake it, I think. To top the disappointment of the job hunt off, I have no one to relate to when it comes to talking about this stuff. Everyone else I know has a job, crappy retail-ish as it might be, and my family's advice is simply "get anything you can and make some pocket money until something better comes along." Nice sentiment, and very supportive of them. (Please note sarcasm.) So what kind of job am I good at? What's going to be intellectually satisfying and make me happy while working at it? Regardless of the money involved - it's never been about the money for me...? I don't know. I'm tired of looking endlessly without any returns on my hard work. I'm tired of jumping through hoops, like converting my resume into eighteen different formats to satisfy employers who are probably going to ignore me anyway. I'm tired of writing cover letters trying to explain why I should get a job at Wal-Mart. I'm tired of applying online instead of talking to a real person about what my qualifications are. I just want this to be over.
Posted by Andrew Meeusen at 19:52