Abecedarian's Post

My name is Andrew. (Hi Andrew.) And it's been 2 weeks since my last post. (Mild clapping ensues.) Lately I've been really getting the urge to post daily, sometimes more than once a day, but I've stayed strong, held off the hounds of hellish social media and networking. (Oohs and aahs ensue, briefly.) Lately, I've just been doing the job hunt thing again, supplemented nicely by a healthy dose of grocery shopping for 6 on the weekends, meal planning for 6 on Saturdays, a college Bible study group Sunday nights, and some geocaching thrown in for good measure when time and transportation present themselves. Regarding the job search, mostly my efforts have remained fruitless, though I have received some calls from "marketing" companies searching for people to promote who-knows-what for minimum wage through telemarketing. Not my thing. I've never been one for just cold-calling sales. Put me on a floor somewhere, with knowledge of products and specs, and I can sell products just fine, but over the phone, I'm not good. I also got a phone call today from a security guard company needing security staff for some event coming up, but I would have needed a "guard card" which I do not have. Might be something to look into getting, though, if those types of opportunities come up more often. On Monday, I did turn in an application to Mesa Public Schools to be a substitute teacher for the district. That quite literally almost made me want to go postal on quite a few people. Quick rundown of the day: 9am - Andrew calls AZDOE to get info on getting a sub certification license and is told it is obtained at MPS headquarters. 10:30am - Andrew arrives at MPS only to be told he has to go to the AZ Dept. of Education to pick up his license, over 20 miles away. 11:15am - Andrew arrives at AZ DOE offices, is told he needs a $60 personal check, cashier's check, or money order to process his application for the license for the MPS application. (AARGH!) 12:00pm - Andrew arrives at Bank of America, takes $60 out of the ATM after spending 15 minutes trying to find out how to park in downtown Phoenix, and is told that because BOA isn't HIS bank, he can't be helped there. 12:30pm - Andrew arrives at a park in Phoenix somewhere (only God knows where exactly), kicks a few trees in anger, and calls Dad to have him look up where the nearest Compass Bank location is. 1:45pm - Andrew arrives at Compass Bank, gets his cashier's check, and gets back into the car. By this point, having expended so much energy on frustration with the system, Andrew decides to go to nearby IHOP for pancakes. 3:00pm - Andrew arrives BACK at DOE offices, obtains license. 3:30pm - Andrew arrives BACK at MPS offices, turns in completed application. Is told that he cannot be eligible for substitute teaching until taking an orientation class for MPS -- ON MARCH 25th! 4:15pm - Andrew decides to go home and go to bed because the day really, really, really couldn't get any more obtuse. Epic, I know. In lighter news, the whole meal-planning, shopping, cooking trifecta (I just wanted to use "trifecta") is going well. I like most of the things I've tried to make. Earlier in the week it was a sour cream chicken enchilada dish with onions and red bell peppers in a sour cream-jalapeno sauce. Really delicious. Two nights ago I made pork chops with an apple-caramelized onion topping, which was probably me second favorite dish. I also tried a veggie casserole side dish which was so-so, but not everyone enjoyed it. I'm not sure what it was, but the topping didn't set like it was supposed to.... Oy vey. Tonight we're either having a turkey chili or bowtie pasta with bell peppers and sausage in a tomato-garlic sauce. We'll see. The Bible study has also been enlightening. It's a group of college-aged under-30 people on Sunday nights at the church I've begun to attend. Since it's been so long since I was last "attending" church regularly, I wasn't certain of what to expect, but the people are great - there are even a few politically-minded people there who make for great conversationalists, and even one other geocacher, which was slightly surprising. Currently, the group is studying the Book of Revelation, so though it's extremely interesting, I sometimes feel like I'm beginning my own study of the Bible at the end of the book. Tribulation, Death, destruction, God's wrath poured out upon the world. Things you really wouldn't expect from a conventional reading of almost any other part of the Bible; least of all those passages talking about Jesus Christ or God Himself. Frankly, I'm still not entirely sure of what I believe. I'd like to believe in God and put my faith in Him, but it's still a little unsettling to feel like I'm giving up control over a part of myself to a being whom I cannot see, touch, or converse with. My journey has begun though, so I am anxious to see where it leads. Finally, geocaching. I had good luck last weekend, finding 14 caches in or within a mile of Skyline Park out in East Mesa. I intend to go back this weekend to find the 3 I didn't try for on Saturday. One is apparently rather difficult and requires tools to access it. I think I know what I need, now I just need to see the site for myself and have at it. I also found a couple on Monday on my way back from MPS, just as a mechanism to calm me down after the stress of the day. So I'm at a grand total of 40 found thus far, and I might try to hike Usury Mountain to the Wind Cave to find the 5 caches up there this coming Saturday. (Scott, Ryan, Chad, you are welcome to join me if you so choose!) Anyway, that's life up 'til now. Time to go do some more dishes and pretend to not be bored until I go to bed. I look forward to writing more often in the near future!

CRASH!

For the second time in roughly three weeks, I was nearly killed - this time in a car accident in Mesa on my way back to work from the post office. Okay, maybe that's a little bit of hyperbole.... I wasn't actually almost killed, but I was hit by a young woman who crossed over about 7 lanes of traffic in order to turn into my lane - with me in it! Don't worry, though. I'm fine, she was fine, and my car still works, there are just several new deep scratches and dents in the driver's door that weren't there before.

My car

Her car

East Valley Job Fair

Today, I went and checked out the EV Job Fair at the Mesa Convention Center after having lunch with my good buddy Scott, who happens to work very close to there. Unfortunately for Max, it was not quite as epic an adventure as the job fair at UPS Stadium in Glendale (Dale Glen for those of you who know of what I speak), but it was nonetheless a decent time. I spoke with Grand Canyon State University about communications/PR/document control positions, a few staffing agencies about temp-to-hire work, M&I Bank about a teller position near my house, and the City of Mesa about some of their open positions. All-in-all, I got to hand out some resumes, chat it up with some employers, and hopefully something will eventually come of it. After doing the meet-and-greet thing, I went around the corner to where they were doing "resume review" workshops, and had my resume critiqued by a professional resume correcting person, whom I am supposed to remember to thank if I ever become President of the United States. (This brings my number of voters for my campaign in 2012 to 36 now. You never know, a few million more and I could be a threat! :P) She gave me some good tips, so now I need to reorganize my resume again this weekend to see if I can't beef it up some more. After that, I tried to donate my time as a volunteer for the GOP out in East Mesa, but I got chewed out by some old woman who was being pretty offensively sexist and tried to threaten me with her "investigative journalist friend who could crush you like THAT." So I just left instead. Ah, fun times!

Stymied By Bureaucracy

I had every intention of going and getting all my substitute teaching paperwork turned in today, getting registered, and just having to wait on the fingerprint clearance from the Department of Public Safety, but alas, I was stymied this afternoon when I was told that in order to turn in all the paperwork, I first needed a substitute teaching certificate from the Arizona Department of Education. However, in order to get the substitute teaching certificate, I must first have the fingerprint clearance card from the Department of Public Safety/Federal Bureau of Investigation. And in order to receive the fingerprint clearance card, I first had to drive all over downtown Mesa this afternoon to find the fingerprinting place, get my fingerprints taken, and then wait 15-180 days to have the background checks completed and receive my clearance card in the mail. It was a rather epic journey, beginning with waking up at 8 am this morning only to find out that my little brother had, in an epic display of FAIL, forgotten again to leave me the only key to my morning mode of travel. This effectively stranded me at home until he got out of school at noon. When he got home, I took the car to downtown Mesa and spent 20 minutes trying to find the Department of Public Safety, which Mesa had, in its infinite wisdom, decided to tuck behind the storefronts and the Department of Information Technology. But I found it - only to be told that my fingerprints couldn't be taken at the central station (as DPS had told me). I needed to go out to the fingerprint clearance card Information Processing Center to which Mesa Police Department had outsourced all non-court mandated fingerprinting. After another 20 minutes of wandering the streets of downtown, I finally found the podunk hole-in-the-wall place, staffed by two women who definitely looked like they could kick my ass (and I'm no little guy). I filled out some paperwork and was ushered into a back room where they inked me up until my fingers were sooty black, fingerprinted me, and let me wash up with some Uber-industrial superdetergent hand cleaner. Upon leaving, I inquired as to where Mesa Public Schools was headquartered, and was told "somewhere up around the corner." Easy enough. Except for the fact that no one told me there were no signs for MPS, which happens to be in the same building as Mesa Bank, a nine-story behemoth of a building in which MPS occupies the second through fourth floors. It took another 20 minutes of circling around before I figured this out. So finally, my hard work paying off, I entered the Substitute Services Department of MPS, paperwork in hand, official transcripts, immunization records, W-2's all filled out properly, and - BOOM! Stymied by the fact that I couldn't get registered as a sub because I didn't have the certificate, which I didn't have because I didn't have the fingerprint clearance card, which I didn't have because it takes 15-180 days to get that in the mail from the time the fingerprinting is done. So, long story short, in between two weeks and six months, I could be a substitute teacher for the Mesa Public School District. Not that they need teachers desperately or anything (note: sarcasm). Ah, bureaucracy, how do I love thee? Let me count the ways...!

Catching Up Is Hard To Do

So many things have been going on and finishing up recently that I figured it was time to post and update the few people that read this. Primary election day was this past Tuesday, and while I put in my 14 hours helping with phone banking, precinct walking, and standing at polling locations around CD-5, it proved not to have been fruitful, as Jim Ogsbury lost the election. He garnered about 11.3% of the vote. David Schweikert ended up being the nominee with about 30% of the vote, followed closely by Susan Bitter-Smith, then Laura Knaperek and Mark Anderson. Only Lee Gentry, the independent pseudo-candidate did worse than us. But, I have no regrets. It was fun working with the Derr brothers and their crack team of people, and I hope I will have the chance to work with them again someday. Also, even though he lost the CD-5 election, Jim Ogsbury was a great guy to have volunteered for, and I firmly believe his door-to-door campaign is something more candidates should do to meet their constituents. Around 8:30pm Tuesday night, the volunteers, staff members, and friends of the candidate and campaign gathered at the Canal restaurant in Scottsdale to await the results. I admit I was fairly excited, because even the photographer from the Tribune said that her bosses were expecting him to do well. But alas, at 8:30 or so, Jim came in, asked for everyone's attention, and said he had just gotten off the phone with Schweikert and Bitter-Smith congratulating them on their race (it was too close to call between them at the time) and said that he was conceding the race. C'est la vie - such is life. You can't win them all. I wish Schweikert the best of luck in challenging Harry Mitchell for the seat, and I hope I get the chance to help out where I can. For those of you wondering about it back in District or elsewhere, I have not yet garnered my dream job, or even a random intermittant job at this point, though not for lack of trying. To date, I have submitted 579 resumes and applications to companies and campaigns since March of this year, and obtained 32 responses, almost all of them the standard "other candidates met our qualifications better" letters or emails. Lowering my expectations seems to be in order now. I am applying at Blockbuster, receptionist spots at doctors' offices, drugstores, OfficeMax, and other retail spots in the hopes that I find something to bring in some pocket change while I continue my hunt. Oh, and my laptop broke, which royally ticked me off last week. Someone dropped it while I was out of the house, and ripped the adapter plug out of the DC jack, breaking it. That jack is apparently attached to the motherboard, and will cost at cheapest around $75 to fix. Not to mention the $32 I just paid for a new adapter. So that was very disappointing, especially considering that most of my resume stuff, cover letters, and nice Microsoft Office 2007 programs are on there. No damage to the hard drive, though, so if I can get the jack repaired, theoretically, all the data should still remain okay.

Friends Don't Let Friends Talk Politics

I've decided that it's actually really hard to talk politics with people who are both your friends and a different political persuasion than one's self. I don't have any idea how it got started, but my boss and one of my residents decided to come up and start talking to me this evening at my desk shift about how the United States has no business in Iraq and asking me about my perspective on the issue. Well, obviously, I think the United States needs to continue to fight terrorism wherever it exists, and getting rid of it in Iraq by maintaining our military presence there is a good thing, not a bad thing. So I said so. Bad idea. It sparked a 90-minute debate on humanitarian-versus-Mongolesque necessities in American foreign policy, and we finally had to break off the debate because it was getting to the point where they were getting ticked at me for being a heartless person, and I was getting frustrated with them because they didn't know about anything that's been going on in our intervention in Iraq. They seriously thought we were just going over there and killing random Iraqi citizens for satisfying our lust for oil. Aargh! From now on, I'm screening all of my friends who try to debate me on Iraq for two things: knowledge of the topic (as opposed to just blithely following whatever they've heard on the CNN 30-second rampage against America), and the skillful ability TO debate, rather than using the age-old standby of "but why do we have to kill other people?"

Big Mothaf#($*!@^ Rock!

Last night certainly was eventful, what with having to deal with some people in the building who decided it would be a good idea to break things. Among the issues: a broken window from a rock someone threw, a broken exit sign someone tore from the ceiling, a broken door and door handle, and one of our fraternities' letters were broken by someone. Three issues involved NAUPD, and I was up (along with my partner on call and our ARHD) until 5am writing reports and taking care of business. All-in-all, the most eventful night I've had all semester. The good news is, I only have 2 more nights on call for the remainder of the semester: one Thursday night in a couple weeks, and one Sunday night at the end of April. Then it should be all downhill from there! Oh, and my Diamondbacks SWEPT the Colorado Rockies with a final score today of 5-2 coming on a ninth-inning 2-run home run by Mark Reynolds and a tenth-inning solo homer by Stephen Drew. Prior to both of those, the DBacks only had three hits, zero runs in the game! I LOVE late-inning heroics!

Snappish!

So, the next time you are considering staying up until 6am to watch a baseball game live televised in the Tokyo Dome at 3:05am in Arizona, maybe think again. Or maybe that's just solid advice for myself. I'm tired, though, admittedly, the game was pretty darn good. Couple of homers, couple of really good defensive plays, great pitching from Rich Harden....

Unfortunately, now I have to go to class and try to think about.... ugh.... organizational psychology. A topic which, if it wasn't actually a requirement, I would just blow off entirely. I'm done with school right now. Done entirely. I want to get out into the workforce and start making something of all this "learning" that I've supposedly been doing over the past 22 years. Though, frankly, I don't see how learning about some of the stuff I've been learning is ever going to help me. Like calculus. Serious, who fucking uses calculus outside of nuclear physicists and boring, stodgy old guys wasting away as math professors at podunk universities?

So basically, to link this to the title of this post.... little sleep makes Andrew a wee bit snappish toward things. I was asked today by my supervisor in our weekly meeting what my goals were for the staff here for the remainder of the year, like having a good fundraiser next week, maintaining strong relationships with my fellow staff members, etc. And you know, the only thing I could think of was: "I think those are just fairly obvious things, not really goals. I mean, of course I want our staff to remain strong over the rest of the year. I'm not going to say I don't want our fundraiser to go well, you know?" In hindsight, I hate doing that, but really, that's what happens when I stay up too late. I'm going to bed early tonight so I can get some shit done tomorrow. Papers and stuff.

Oh, and apparently I have a library book that was due in October still in my possession. I think the library is screwing me over. All I can say is that this better not fuck with my graduation or I am gonna be ticked.

"The Lumberjack" Screws Students Over Again

This time, though, it wasn't the College Republicans. Yesterday, the Lumberjack released a "specialty publication" entitled the "Best of NAU" with a bunch of little blurbs about a variety of people, places, and things that students could read and then go online and complete a survey to vote for the best ______ in Flagstaff. Sample categories: 1. Hottest professor (male and female) 2. Best place to have sex on campus 3. Best place to take someone on a first date 4. Best activity for underage people on a Friday night 5. Best fraternity/sorority Well, unfortunately, their writers at the paper (who shall remain nameless, as I know who they are and don't want a witch-hunt) decided to write the following things about several of the Greek chapters at NAU: 1. Alpha Omicron Pi: "On Nov. 23, 1963, NAU was blessed with Alpha Omicron Pi sorority (YAY, us)." 2. Alpha Delta Pi: "... And if you're still not convinced, we heard a rumor that they like to get busy with some pretty wild pillow fights." 3. Kappa Alpha: "... So when you see KA on those sweaters and shirts all over campus, be sure to let them know we're not worthy of their excellence." 4. Phi Delta Theta: "So maybe you're actually into the whole brotherly love thing, but we know most of you are only into it for the trips to Lake Havasu and the easy access to sorority girls." 5. Pi Kappa Alpha: "Plus, we hear they can play a mean game of beer pong." 6. Theta Chi (these are my residents): "Who the hell wants to be an ox for life? ... Located in Mountain View, the fraternity is on campus and ready to do whatever fraternities do. I guess being a big dumb animal for life doesn't sound so bad after all." So, basically, Greeks were insinuated as being: blessed, full of themselves, wild, party animals, womanizers, alcoholics, and big dumb animals who don't really do anything. Um, yeah, not cool. Many, many of these people are my good friends, and aside from the obvious that they're pretty pissed about this stuff, the writers did not take into account all the good things that these chapters do, including donating tens of thousands of dollars collectively to charity annually, posting thousands of hours of community service annually, having some of the highest collective grade point averages of any group on campus, and being leaders on our campus (student body president, homecoming king, ASNAU senators, etc). Because the writers are not themselves Greeks, and because they did not seek the input of anyone within the Greek system regarding these comments, and because, well, a lot of this stuff is just false altogether or unfounded, their comments are also libelous. Yesterday, when my staff and I found out about this article, I came up with the idea to organize a petition drive to get my residents in Mountain View to sign to formally request that the Lumberjack both retract their statements and issue an apology to all the chapters, which I implemented and obtained 356 signatures for in about 8 hours (which percentage-wise equalled 67% of my building). I delivered the petition to the Lumberjack head honcho today with Greek Life coordinator Wendy Davison during a meeting she was having to try to come to an amicable conclusion about the issue. During the meeting between Wendy and I and the two Lumberjack advisors, they refused to retract any of their statements, citing creative license (despite the fact that each chapter paid around $120.00 for the advertising space), and were exceptionally indignant about the whole matter, refusing to apologize for any of their insults on the grounds that "it is entertainment" and "it was supposed to be funny" and "it accomplished its mission of being a fundraiser." Well, needless to say, my whole building is pretty much up in arms. After living here in this community for a year, I really understand that the stereotypes portrayed by "Animal House" or "American Pie: Beta House" are very much unfounded and defamatory, and all the work that my residents have done on NAU's campus to dispel that negative image was washed out by less than 100 words in yesterday's paper. You might think "but does anyone actually read the paper?" Well, I can tell you that 5,000 EXTRA copies were printed just yesterday so that they can be placed on the Dome seats during sporting events, and the results copy of the paper yet to be released is set to be given to everyone attending graduation in May of this year. So yeah, it's going to get read. And not just by students, but by their parents, friends, relatives, little siblings, everything. So, I'll post again later on some of the results of the next couple weeks as this issue moves forward, but I have heard tell that two chapters, Phi Delta Theta and Theta Chi, are preparing lawsuits alleging defamation of character over the issue. I will be helping as much as I can, so I hope anyone who is reading this will also show their support for what I feel is a more than worthy cause.